Beyond Words: How Listening, Presence, and Trust Shape Inclusive Communication for LGBTIQA+ People

Inclusive communication is not just about words. 
It’s about creating spaces that convey respect, recognition, and safety, especially for LGBTIQA+ individuals. From the way we speak, to our posture, the tone of our voice, and everything that can be considered para-verbal, all the way to the symbols we display, every choice sends a message: you are welcome here, or you are not.

This was, in very concrete terms, one of the clearest findings to emerge from the many activities carried out as part of our project Pitch Perfect, a KA210 Erasmus+ project in the field of adult education, coordinated by Close in the Distance (Italy) in partnership with Stichting art.1 (Netherlands).

From the very beginning, the project aimed to promote LGBTIQA+ inclusive language and communication in educational, social, and healthcare settings: sectors where the need for inclusive practices is often underestimated. 
However, as the project unfolded, workshop after workshop, focus group after focus group, and through ongoing dialogue with our participants in both Italy and the Netherlands, and across Europe, our understanding of inclusive communication itself began to expand.

If it’s not just about words, then what is it really about?

Throughout Pitch Perfect, we thoroughly explored the glossary related to LGBTIQA+ culture. We named things, defined identities, unpacked acronyms, and took time to understand the nuances behind terms like trans, intersex, and non-binary. We addressed the risks of medicalising individual experiences and questioned the implications of language that constantly, often implicitly, refers to a pathologising view of gender diversity, especially in relation to the broad and complex world of transgender identities. Instead, we embraced a more welcoming, positive, and celebratory approach to communication, one that rejects the idea of a wrong body in need of correction.

On a practical level, we also engaged with complex linguistic challenges. We discussed how to write inclusively in Italian using the schwa or asterisk, and how to navigate the evolving landscape of pronouns and inclusive language in English.

And yet, what ultimately emerged, clearly and repeatedly, is that truly inclusive communication goes far beyond terminology. It’s not only about getting the words right, but about cultivating a space where LGBTIQA+ people feel heard, respected, and recognised.

This is why the core of our training and collective reflection focused on three essential principles: Cultural Competence, Active Listening, and Affirmative Practices, for example actively incorporating visual cues, tangible tools, and elements of material culture.

These are not simply soft skills. They form the foundation of meaningful, ethical, and inclusive support work. In education, counseling, and psychological care, what matters most is not only what we say, but how we say it, how we listen, and whether we create the conditions that allow people to speak in the first place.

What Are These Three Foundations?

For us, our beneficiaries and working group, Cultural Competence ultimately meant recognising that gender identity, sexual orientation, and expression are shaped by deeply rooted social, cultural, and personal contexts. In our activities and resources, this translated into more than just avoiding assumptions or choosing respectful language. It meant exploring what the gay, lesbian, and queer movements have represented historically, politically, and socially. We examined their victories, tensions, and complexities, understanding that behind every word, acronym, or slogan lies a history of struggle, meaning, and identity.

Active Listening was about imagining and testing a form of dialogue that is genuinely open. We applied specific techniques to broader contexts such as non formal education, lifelong learning, mentoring, and family support. It meant practicing what it truly means to accept others unconditionally, shaping our communication at every level so that this acceptance could be perceived immediately, naturally, and with empathy.

Affirmative Practices involved making visible and intentional choices that support inclusion. This includes language and cultural awareness, but also visual and material elements. Pitch Perfect's playing cards are one example. They are not just tools for facilitation, but concrete signs that the space, our setting, is indeed aware, welcoming, and safe for LGBTIQA+ individuals, even before exchanging any words. From there, we moved into more structured reflection on affirmative methodologies, always staying connected to material practices and to the ways inclusive spaces can be created through conscious design, everyday gestures, and the smallest but most powerful acts of recognition.

And now?

Pitch Perfect began its journey by taking the IGLYO LGBTQI Youth Mental Health in the Spotlight report as a point of departure. That was less than two years ago. Has anything changed since then? If anything, the landscape has grown more complex and, at times, more resistant. Reliable data on LGBTIQA+ inclusion remains scarce, while inclusive language and practices continue to face pushback in many educational and professional settings across Europe.

Yet these past two years have shown us that change begins with small, everyday gestures. It lives in the way we speak, listen, relate to one another, and in how we shape the spaces around us to truly welcome difference. As Pitch Perfect approaches its final phase, we move forward not only with a set of tools and open resources, but with a renewed sense of responsibility.

For this reason, we invite the broader European educational community to explore our materials, to reflect critically on their own practices, and to join us for the project’s final moments of sharing and exchange. Even the smallest of actions can help build and strengthen a collective, inclusive counter-narrative that fully recognises the power of communication in shaping the quality of a space, a service, or a pathway, whether educational, psychological, or related to mentoring.

Because inclusion is not a destination. It is a process we commit to, together.